LeBron's "Welcome" Bash in Miami

It certainly wasn't for diabetics or those with a bad gag reflex, that's for sure.

Just when you thought that LeBron James couldn't have topped the ridiculousness charts after his "interview" with Jim Gray and his announcement of his decision to join the Miami Heat at a Boys & Girls Club in Greenwich, Connecticut of all places (the irony is that it's one of the wealthiest zip codes in the United States), he appeared as a wing man to Dwayne Wade at the Miami Heat's "welcome" party last night. I don't have a link to the video, but you have to try to find one, because he topped what he did two nights ago and gave his critics and haters even more ammunition which what could best be described as a self-indulgent, "aren't I and we great" love fest that was too gross to be believed. LeBron also joined Chris Bosh in playing wingman to Dwayne Wade, making him and Bosh "Pips" to Wade's Gladys Knight, or putting him as just another guy on the back line of the Temptations (to borrow a phrase from Simon Cowell). I'm sure at some point some Heat guy will thrust LeBron front and center in honor of the late Patrick Swayze's famous line in the big dance scene at the end of "Dirty Dancing", when he takes Jennifer Grey's character from her seat and says, "No one puts Baby in the corner." No one will put LeBron in the back line for long, either, and that will make all fans wonder who should be front and center -- Wade or James. And that's when things could get interesting.

In any event, it was another "over the top" affair, worse than the announcement itself, and just more cannon fodder for opponents in other cities who will make sure that they are up for the Heat every time they play them. Dwight Howard, Jameer Nelson, Kevin Garnett, Paul Pierce, Ray Allen, Rajon Rondo, Derrick Rose, Carlos Boozer, Joachim Noah and, of course, Kobe Bryant, who will be gunning for the Heat the way challenger Clubber Lang went after Rocky in Rocky III, with one exception.

Kobe is smart enough and determined enough not to suffer Clubber's fate after he dethroned Rocky. And besides, Kobe has more rings than the 3 Kings, as they're calling themselves, have combined.

The Heat are loaded beyond belief.

And that will make it all the more fun for their challengers to yell, "Timber."